Friday, 2 March 2018

I Kissed an Angel - chapter 2

SHE’S IN MY THINKING
I opened my eyes and they fell on my wrist watch. It was past five already. I had been sleeping for more than three hours. I had refused to miss my afternoon nap since I wrote my final examinations.
            While still in bed, my final CGPA, the last thought before I fell asleep, was still my waking thought. Despite all efforts I put in, I was not able to wallow out of the quicksand of Second-class Lower. I made frantic efforts to move up during the last year but I had gone down too deep. That afternoon when my final CGPA was announced to me, I almost collapsed. It was 3.40; instead of the much desired 3.50. Only one more step to Second-class Upper. I was disappointed in myself. I was finished! My hope was shattered! The thought of a bleak future weakened me. I walked wearily back to my room and dumped myself in bed. I didn’t know when I slept off.
            I was still rolling in thought when Emma breezed in. He calmed down when he saw me as if to let a sleeping dog lie. I saw his tall frame in a black suit, over a white polo shirt and jeans trousers. He was chuckling as he approached me. Looking at him, I was sure he had something to say. He always had something to say, you know. What could it be this time? Whatever, I have no time for his humorous trivial.
Emma’s sense of humour combined with his philosophical outlook on life made me call him “wise clown”. Emma had been a good friend of mine since my second year in the University, when he was a freshman. We met in the Christian Union and he had remained the only Christian friend who understood my spiritual predicament.
            While I was trying to understand what the wise clown was up to, he sat on the only sofa in the room and covered his face with a news magazine. Then I remembered telling him in the morning that I was going to see my final results today. That’s it! I couldn’t hide it from him, anyway.
            I turned away and face the glass-down window that walled my side of the room. I pulled the curtains and looked through the louvers. I could see many parts of the campus from that third floor. Examinations were ended and the school was being deserted. The notorious female hall of residence that used to wear multi-coloured night-dress of activities lay like an abandoned harlot, stripped of excitement. Only few males were seen around her.
            I couldn’t see the library from here, but I was sure no student remembered it existed. I remembered the number of tasking hours I spent in there and the result – Oh, it made me shiver.
            I was lost in my thought when I heard a distant voice calling me. I turned to Emma and asked, “Did you say something?”
            He had changed position from the sofa to the table and sat just beside me. “What’s up, bro? Your thoughts are deep.”
            “Don’t pull my leg, man. You already know.”
            “True, I don’t know. I can only guess.”
            “Guess then.”
            He stared at me for a moment and said, “Tell me about your result.”
            “You wise clown! Haven’t you seen it all over me?”
            “Of course. It’s all over you. But it shouldn’t tie you down.”
            “Only one step, bro.” I sat up as if I was going to take the step. “One step remaining to hit it!
            “Yes friend. But you shouldn’t allow one step backward to stop you from going more steps forward. You shouldn’t allow what you don’t have to stop you from enjoying what you do have.”
            “It has already stopped me from enjoying one of the best things in life.”
            “It shouldn’t stop the rest.”
            “Where do I go from here? Where do I go with Second-class Lower?” I covered my face deep in my hands and rubbed them down with a deep sigh. “It’s sad that everyone knows that I’m brilliant. How does it compute that I’m in two-two? They’ll not believe it.”
            “What’s your problem, Temi? Tell me what’s wrong with you. You’ve got yourself a gentleman’s two-two, a three pointer, and you talk as if you’re the worst student on campus. You can’t continue worrying yourself lean! Don’t you see that you’re good? You don’t think about guys who are in Third Class, or even others who are not graduating because of loads of carryovers. You’re better off, man. Please count your blessings.”
            You don’t compare me with those guys. They didn’t read, not a fraction of what I read!”
            “And so you’re ahead of them!” He paused. But I didn’t respond. “Come to think about it, Temi. Don’t you think you’re a hero?” He paused again and searched my face. “You lifted your CGPA from almost nothing to a three pointer in two sessions. That’s heroic. Don’t you think?
            Emma was right. I caused the snag in the first place.  I had to study hard to raise my head out of the rubbles.
            I nodded in agreement. Emma continued: “Einstein dropped out of school. Bill Gates didn’t make it to college.  Wole Soyinka finished first degree with third class. Today they are celebrated as best brains in the world. Are you still asking where you can go from here?”
            The humorous manner with which he asked that question made me laugh. We both laughed.
            “Look at you, worrying yourself lean. Cheer up and enjoy life! Let’s go out tomorrow.”
            “Where?”
            “There are two big events tomorrow – a birthday party and a praise night.”
            “Tomorrow’s end of semester praise night?”
            “Bro, you’re too far from fellowship! We’ll make the two, right?” he asked and didn’t wait for me answer. “We’ll be at the party first, and then come back to campus for the praise night.”
            “The party’s out of campus? Who’s celebrating?”
            “Florence, my cousin. Remember her? She has been here a couple of times.”
            “Yes, but I’ve lost her face.”
            “You’ll pick it up tomorrow. We move by three. A deal?”
            “Deal”, I answered reluctantly.


I reached out to my goals for the session, posted on the wall at my reading table. The first was “To make second class upper!” I was sad I didn’t make it. I didn’t achieve my most important goal that session.
            I looked down the checklist. I had achieved the other six goals. Suddenly, it dawned on me: if I have achieved six out of seven goals, I shouldn’t be sad. I should rather be glad! I should have a sense of fulfillment for once. The skies are not coming down. And even if they are, we can receive them gladly. Others have gone through this way and have made the best of it. What’s wrong here? I should put my problem in perspective for once!
            I got myself spoken to and I stood up to face the challenges. As I stood up, I saw the problem sat down! I went violently for it and it knelt down begging. “Listen to me,” I spoke to it, “You aren’t going to ride on me. I’m your master and you must remain under my subjection. If you dare make any move of taking my place again, I’ll keep you under lock and key!”
            That did it. I felt freedom like cold breeze blew over my face. It was my angel.
            “Good!”
            Long time no see.
            “You’re still long time away from reality.”
            It’s that why you people failed me?
            “You failed yourself, young man! The issue of academic success is 95 percent human.”
            But your 5 percent makes 95 percent difference.
            “Yes, if you’re 95 percent committed!”
            He was gone. I relaxed and thought about it. Then, in a jiffy, he was back.
            “Haven’t you learnt your lesson enough? How long will you stay away from home?”
            I’m with the Lord. I prayed this morning.
            “Excuse me! You prayed? Did you hear Him? Did you care to hear Him speak to you? Communication is two way, young man.”
            That doesn’t mean I don’t love the Lord. I might not love Him the way you do but…
            “Point of correction! The way you used to.”
            Yea…the way I used to…well…
            He was gone.


I woke the following morning with a sense of fulfillment and a feeling of dissatisfaction in my spirit. I tried to let the former override the later. I was in that state of mixed feeling when I took a nap in the noon.
            It was Emma who woke me up. He was in designer’s jacket. “Dress up and let’s be going. I’m going to pick up a gift in Surulere and we’re going to Apapa road.
            I rose and made for the bathroom.
            “Don’t tell me you’re going to have another bath.”
            “I haven’t had one today.”
            “Time is not on our side.”
            “We’re going in your car. Aren’t we?” I asked as I walked into the bathroom.
            “That’s not enough. We are picking the gift in Surulere and we have to pull through the traffic in Ojuelegba.”
            “Yea, yea, I know. I’ll be with you in a moment,” I shouted under the shower. I rushed out of the bathroom and dressed like my friend.


The traffic was building when we zoomed past Ojuelegba to Ogunlana where we picked up the gift. From Ogunlana Drive we headed for Akerele to Masha where we joined Western Avenue via the National Stadium. Then we drove straight to Apapa Road.
            We pulled down in front of a large mansion and we were ushered to a grand reception, the best I had seen in recent times. The entire compound was lavishly decorated with curtains, balloons and flowers. The cake paraded itself on a bright and colourful platform. Waiters were everywhere dressed in clean white long-sleeve shirts and orange trousers or skirts, with orange bow tie to match. Music played softly.
            Emma led the way as we pulled through guests to the balcony of the main house. The security personnel at the glass door saluted Emma and opened to us. We entered into a large well-furnished sitting room where a few guests were seated. We had not settled down when a girl dressed in white gown like a bride came running toward us.
            “Emma!” she screamed. All eyes in the room turned to them as she dumped herself into his arms.
            “Flozy baby!”
            “Dad is worried about you. You must see him immediately.”
            “Come on, Flozy. Hey, it’s your birthday! Happy, happy, happy birthday!”
            Emma introduced me. Then she took us round the room introducing us to everyone. When she came to two lovely girls she said, “Guys meet my great friend at school, Amina and her cousin, Aisha.”
            Both girls were fair. Amina dressed heavily like her friend. Aisha dressed like a typical Hausa girl with a white shawl around her shoulders.
            As the instant I met Aisha’s eyes something flashed in them and attracted me to her. She smiled shamefully while I wondered what transpired at that first sight.
            After the introduction, Florence drove Emma upstairs and came for Amina a moment later.
            We were served chilled wine.
            As soon as I tasted the wine, I turned in Aisha’s direction and our eyes met. She smiled. I couldn’t miss the green light. It was like scales were cast off my eyes and I could see an angel beside me. Her beauty glowed, her eyes sparkled, and she radiated an aura that seemed to fill that room.
            “The wine is refreshing. Isn’t it?” I began.
            “Yes, it is.” She answered and stared at her glass as if the question came from inside.
            “Aisha,” I called gently. “Were you at the same school with Amina and Florence?”
            “No,” she answered quickly, her eyes glued to the glass.
            “So, where were you?”
            “Pardon?”
            “I mean which school did you go?”
            Government Girls Secondary School.”
            “I never heard of any such school in Lagos.
            “It’s in Nasarawa.”
            “All the way! So what are you doing in Lagos?
            “Looking for admission into Unilag.”
            “You don’t say.” I was really excited to hear that. “You’ve got it!”
            “I hope so. It’s quite difficult.”
            Amina and Flozy appeared on the staircase. I thought they were coming our way but they passed by and went out of the room.
When I turned back to Aisha she began her own round of questioning. “What do you do, Mr…”
            “Temi.” I helped her. “I’m a student in Unilag.”
            “How’s it on campus?”
            “Fashy and funny.”
            “How do you mean?”
            “Can’t find better words to describe it. Things are simply flashy and funny out there. It’s like every body’s trying to be who they are not.”
            “Have you been up north?”
            “No. why do you ask?”
            She shook her head and kept quiet. I wanted to break the silence but I thought I should let her. A moment later, Amina came to call us to come outside for a toast.
            After the toast I wanted to keep the conversation going, so I asked Aisha, “You schooled in Nasarawa. Are you Hausa?”
            “No.”
            “That’s surprising. You’re not Hausa and you’re from Nasarawa.”
            “I’m not an indigene of Nasarawa. I only grew up there. My parents are from Jos.”
            “Interesting. But you speak Hausa.”
            “Yes, of course.”
            “Sanu yarinya.”
            “You speak Hausa?”
            “Not fluently, yes, but enough to communicate.”
            She was very happy. It showed all over her. “You know since I came to Lagos you’re the first non-Hausa person I have met who could speak Hausa. How did you come about it?”
            “I learnt to speak from my childhood friends. There were couple of Hausa families in my neighbourhood.”
            Since that discovery, Aisha became closer, and she hardly spoke English to me again.
            When Emma finally came down, he was surprised to see how close Aisha and I had become, and he expressed it. I tried to explain to my friend but it seemed words could not express the chemistry between us. Let me express it this way:

I met you for the first time
As an encasement
Full of dreams and fears
Chemically combined together.
The content of my mind brimming over,
I tiptoed to your doorstep and
You embraced me in your
Mysterious compound
Of humane elements,
Neutralizing my fears
And precipitating my dreams.
The residue was weighed
And it was found to be chemically unbalanced.
What transpired during the chemical reaction?
What flawed the law of conservation of mass?
A nuclear reaction in our emotional makeup?
The inference to this chemistry is a puzzle.
Who can tell?


We were driving back to campus when I heard him.
            “You’ve got yourself a babe!”
            My angel?
            “Yes, who else do you think I am. Come on boy, you’re doing great. You want her, don’t you? I know you do.  Now you’ll shake her.
            No, I …
            “Yes, come on be a man. Shake her!” he screamed.
            Yes, but I…
            “You’re not serious,” he shouted at me. “You’ve got yourself a sweet banana. Shake her! Touch her! Hmm… Enjoy her!” He screamed.
            Yes, but who’s that?
            He’s gone.
            “Not I.”
            Who?
            “You’ve got yourself a new friend.”
            Yes, her name is Aisha.
            “Not the girl. The guy. You’re getting yourself into real big trouble with this guy around you.”
            Who?
            He’s gone.
            “I want the best for you, man. I want you to enjoy yourself. You are about to hit it big, okay, if you’d listen to me. Now listen to me and listen good!” he keeps shouting.
            My angel doesn’t shout. He doesn’t force his way. So I asked, Who are you, Mr. Loudspeaker?
            “You know me. I just helped you get a beautiful girl for your enjoyment! And I did it because I want the best for you. See, I’ve packaged in her things that make for life and enjoyment. And she’s all yours to enjoy. Simply open her up in your mind. See what I mean? Come on then, shake her… enjoy her…
            Hmm, I see…
            “Are you not going to come down from the car?” It was Emma. “Hasn’t that girl got you?”
            I shook it off, my heart beating fast. “I’m sorry,” I said as I came out of the car.
            We were at the chapel already. The magnificent building was heavily lighted and one could hear music from the outside. Ushers were out there to receive us.
            The music was good and the fellowship sweet. But I was not so much interested in the activities in the chapel as my mind was filled with Aisha and reveled in the beauty of the new girl in my life.
            The speaker came up afterward and spoke as if he knew what was in my mind. Taking his text from Romans, he spoke vigorously against me and my newly found affair:
“For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit. For to be carnally minded is death: but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. Because the carnal mind is enmity against God; for it is not subject to God, neither indeed can be.”
            “The mind is the faculty for thinking and imagination. We think in pictures. When we think, we form series of images reeling across the screen of our mind. This series of images is what we call imagination.
            “The imagination is God’s special gift to us. He gave us to in order to help us to be creative like Him. You can use it to create pictures of beautiful things…and, of course, ugly things! Think of a beautiful garden full of colourful flowers. Can you see it? See yourself walking inside the garden. See the trees. You can hear birds singing in the trees? You can smell the sweet fragrance. Can you? There’s a stream running across the garden. Can you see it? Oh, it’s beautiful! Now think of a girl or guy you like so much, both of you walking hand-in-hand inside the garden…
            “Now, come back!” (He said it sharply and a roar of disapproval rang in the auditorium. Obviously, everyone was dreaming. And I was gone with Aisha.)
            “If I don’t call you back, you can go on in your imagination. The point I’m trying to let you see is that you have the power to imagine. This power is God’s special gift to you. He gave you this ability to help you to be creative like Him.
            “But many young people misuse this gift of God. You misuse your imagination when you use it to create pictures that God has forbidden. Young people enjoy using their imagination to create nude pictures in their mind, and by so doing abuse God’s special gift.
            “Immoral thinking defiles you. It makes you unclean and unfit to relate to your Maker. It degrades you and makes you lose your self-esteem.
            “There’s a mysterious way in which what we think about day and night becomes a reality. If you don’t stop it, it will stop you! Soon you’ll carry out what you think about. That is why wise king Solomon said, ‘As a man thinks so he is’. Immoral thinking makes you immoral.
            “Why do many young people think immorality? Immoral thinking is gratifying; people derive pleasure in it. That’s why they wouldn’t give it up easily. But the Lord warns us, ‘Whoever looks at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.’
            “To be carnally minded is death. To allow immorality in your mind is to embark on a suicide mission. If you refuse to disengage your mind from immoral thinking, you make yourself God’s enemy. And our God is a consuming fire!
            “So He’s calling you to remove immorality from your thinking. He is calling you to holiness of heart and mind. This must be your goal even if you feel you cannot do it. The Lord can help you if you will allow Him.
            “Now the Lord stretches out His hand of love to help you overcome your wrong thinking. If you’re willing to let Him help you, come right to this altar and I will pray with you.”

That was a short and serious message I’d heard in recent times. Apparently, everyone in that auditorium was moved by it. It was for me and I felt like going out to make it up but I also felt alright. I’ve given my life to the Lord. The call is for people who haven’t done so.
            I was touched as I saw guys and girls getting out of the pews and making it down the aisles to the altar. Obviously, the Spirit was making waves across the auditorium and cries of contrition filled the air.
            I was moved out of my seat. Then I heard him, “Don’t be a fool!” He shouted me down. “Look at brothers and sisters. Do you see any one of them at the altar? These people going to the altar are newcomers. You should rather be praying for them. Alright?”
            Somehow, I didn’t buy his argument, but while I was dilly-dallying, the final prayer was said and the meeting was over.


I saw myself on a shore of interminable ocean cuddling my catch. It was dawn. The sun rose stealthily pouring her rays on my head. Nobody was in sight but my pearl. I was going to pocket it, but it turned out to be a damsel smiling stylishly at me. I was taken aback. But she offered her hand and I took it. I looked up at the sun: her smiling face has turned to a scowl. I shunned her and led my pearl away.
            In a spell, the sea turned to a desert of sand, terracing in torches of mirages into the horizon. Now everywhere around us was dark – thick darkness that seemed impassible – saving for the hot torches of sand before us. We began to trudge along.
            Suddenly, sand storms rose against our journey and she shared her shawl with me. It was a long journey, so long that our clothes turned rags due to age, except the white shawl, which was as white as ever. We continued to trudge along.  We were weary but couldn’t stop. Our eyes were fixed to the horizon. We climbed up and down the rolling heaps of sand, expecting hope to welcome us, but it seemed light-years ahead.
            Soon, hope glowed in the horizon. The glimmer of its appearance was a wave of delight that enlivened our worn-out bodies. Our cloths were renewed, as new as when we left the shore of sands. Out strength was revived. We rose up with a start, looking surprisingly at each other.

            The surrounding turned into a green field. Excited, we spread our arms to embrace each other. But she disappeared. It was dawn again and I was alone at the shore of an interminable ocean.

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